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Listen while you read: "Angels We Have Heard On High"1 (Lyrics) |
"I've got too many bad memories of the holidays, especially Christmas," a friend told me some years ago. "Everybody seems to be having a wonderful time, while I can barely hold it together. What can I do?"
She was asking because she sensed that it was also true for me: Christmas as survival. In those days, I just wanted it to be over. Both of my parents grew up in alcohol-fueled backgrounds. Every year, they fought the same battles with each other. As soon as we were old enough to remember, we kept well out of sight, making little hideouts like bomb shelters in the bottoms of our closets. I'd take my little brother in with me and hold him close.
One year, our parents threw an entire set of dishes at each other, piece by piece, across the living room. The crashing of cups and salad plates was all the warning that it took about not being noticed. On Christmas Day, there would be rolls of coverless comics in the stockings that we'd hung, but nothing personal under the tree. The sound track would be my parents screaming at one another. By then, the tree leaned precariously towards the floor, branches denuded, and broken ornaments scattered underneath.
Yes, we went to church for the nativity pageant. My parents put on a good front, but it stopped at our front door. I wished that I were anywhere but at home.
"I can't forget how bad those Christmases were!" my friend said. "I've tried over and over, but the memories seem worse every year."
I told her that I had stopped trying when I realized that Christmas is God doing for us what we cannot do for ourselves. God didn't send His only Son into a perfect world. Nobody plans to give birth in a stable, no matter how picturesque or full of angels.
Someone said, Without memory, there is no healing. Without forgiveness, there is no future.
We give those painful memories to God, praying, "I can't handle them, God. You take over."
Faith is courage that has said its prayers. We act on it. We depend on God's love. We share it with others until it becomes a habit, till the old past fades away.
1 Corinthians 2:9b – Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him. (NKJV)
These good things are waiting for us to claim them.
It is up to us to forgive those makers of our old memories, in order to let God change our hearts. Then, everything changes, because of the Baby in the manger.
Prayer: Dear Father God, we thank You for the gift of Your Son. Help us to break free of our old way of thinking about the past and to accept the new life that You keep ready for us through Your mercy and grace. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
daughter: "Update May 19, 2025: Please keep praying for our daughter. She has another health concern which we..." 
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Inspiring words, Rose. God bless.
What an inspiring and uplifting article. It will hit home with many people, I think.
Wonderful. So well put. Thank you for sharing this. I pray it helps others as it did me. Shalom
Thanks, Rose. I like this: Without memory, there is no healing. Without forgiveness, there is no future.
Thank you for sharing a painful memory in order to help others. I wish you peace and joy and love on this Christmas.
Sometimes Christmas of our childhood years can be so beautiful that when we don’t have it anymore this can be painful.
Rose, this is such a blessed perspective that is a gift from the ONE gives us light and peace and hope! Thank you for writing so beautifully.
Dear Rose – you have handed so much over to the Lord in order to share in meaningful ways with all of us. What a blessing you are. Thanks and thanks again.
Thank you, Rose (and welcome back!), for this excellent reminder that Christmas is not all sleighbells and tinsel for everyone. We need to be aware of others around us who may suffer rather than rejoice at Christmas.
So good to hear from you!!
I always enjoy your devotionals and look forward to the next ones!!
You make sense of a funny world!!
Thanks for sharing all your stories and helping others understand theirs.
Good morning, Rose!
I knew this was you after reading just at the beginning.
You have opened your book of life so many times to us to draw us closer to Jesus.
Thank you my far away sister in Christ.
Finally, you’re back! I knew from the first lines that you were the author.
Christmas must have been fraught with bad memories for your parents as well. It is hard to shake off bad habits that one has grown up with. This will be an especially hard month for you Rose but know that many are praying for you.
Hello, Rose,
So good to read a devotional from you again, and such a meaningful one, as always. Forgiving the past is never easy but so important, it seems to me, in order to move forward.
May you have a blessed and peaceful Christmas this year.
Dear Rose,
It is so good to read your devotionals again. You must have been a very responsible and loving sister. You are also kind to your readers in sharing that God is not only the healer of broken hearts, but the healer of memories. May you have a peaceful Christmas by remembering the Lord and making a beautiful new memory.
Amen Rose.
I’m sorry that your childhood memories of life and especially Christmas were not happy ones but am grateful that in Christ we are all able to find fulfillment and joy amidst our scars.
May this Christmas be an especially peaceful and comforting one in your life and household.
Blessings.
Oh dear, Rose, I can totally relate to your childhood memories, I have a similar past. Thank you for your beautiful message today, it has opened a new door to a better way to deal with the trauma of the past.
I will be sending this to my sister who has major issues with the memories of our childhood.
God bless you and Merry Christmas.
(ON)
Dear Rose:
Thank you for your devotional today! Thank you for your courage to share such painful memories. Glory to God for your faith and ministry!!
You are very right: we must bring everything to the Cross and our Saviour will erase every sin, every pain and truly make ALL things new…
May God bless your parents and all your family.
In Christ,
(Chile)
Morning Rose,
Today’s devotional written by you made quite an impact on me.
1. Grateful thoughts about my wonderful parents
2. Curious thoughts about how you turned such a traumatic youth into being who you are
3. Gratitude that God “found” you.
Thank you for your thought-provoking devotional
I always look forward to reading the devotional when I see that you have written it.
Thank you for helping us focus on the most important thing no matter what has happened in the past; Jesus.
It is a huge challenge for many, but your message gives hope and a way through. Prayers for a Christmas season filled with peace, love, joy, and hope for you and your family, Rose!
Oh Rose, how sad are those memories, but how wonderful is God’s peaceful love! May God be our safe hiding place. Thank you for so bravely sharing.
Blessings.