Doubts And Dungeons

Wednesday, January 26, 2022
Listen to this devotional:
Listen while you read: "Jesus Keep Me Near The Cross"1 (Lyrics)

While my husband went to university, I ran a hostel for teenage runaways in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. Kids from every small town came to the city for what they thought would surely be fun times and adventure, only to wind up beaten, lost, and alone, if they were lucky. Both boys and girls came regularly as the police passed them on to me, even in the middle of the night, after picking them up on the street. Some were newly pregnant, suicidal, and confused, needing mothering and common sense while they waited for the province to send them home.

I lived there full-time with my three small children. Agency social workers kept coming and going, so we couldn't have visitors or leave the premises, even if teens were momentarily absent, especially on weekends, which meant no church. All the bugs hadn't been worked out of the program to give me time off from that ceaseless flow of teenage angst.

The ensuing isolation took me down into what Pilgrim's Progress calls Doubting Castle, where Giant Despair beats Hopeful and Christian until they are nearly dead and casts them into his dungeon. I, too, had become a prisoner, beating myself up in a dungeon that my mind had made. The doubts? I began to think that God had forgotten me or didn't care or didn't even exist at all. Doubts led me to think that there was no hope.

Prayer was a habit that I couldn't stop, though. I also had many experiences of God's love to call on from the past. Someone said, "Faith is believing when doubting would be easier."

Back in Doubting Castle, Christian clings to faith and finally digs in his pocket to discover the key called Promise, with which he and Hopeful could have escaped all along. As I read the book, I began to remember God's promises and care for me. The doubts melted away as I returned to the faith which has always kept me — and still does, all these long years later.

Don't just sit around wishing that you could believe. Read your Bible! Daily Bible reading is the pocket that holds the key to our way out, with God's promises and care for us. Collect all the keys — a lifetime search. It has been estimated that there are as many as 30,000 promises in the Bible.

Hebrews 4:16 – So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. (NLT)

Prayer: Dear Father God, how grateful we are, not just for Your always fulfilling Your promises to believers, but for the hope that infuses our every step, for the trials that only make us stronger, and for the sorrows that make us human. Forgive us our doubts and straying from the path. Reclothe us in our rightful mind, in purer love Thy service find, in deeper reverence, praise. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.

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About the author:

Rose DeShaw <rise370@gmail.com>
Kingston, Ontario, Canada

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1 Comment

  • PresbyCan Feedback says:

    Thank you.


    Amen to that Rose!


    Beautiful as always dear Rose.


    Thanks Rose – what a powerful story!
    (BC)


    Thank you for sharing this encouraging devotional with us! Blessings.


    Thanks for sharing your experience, Rose. You are a blessing to many.


    What an interesting life you have had doing God’s work, Rose. Great reminder. Thanks and blessings!


    Another incredible message dear Rose.
    Thank you so much.
    Blessings.


    Rose, I love the intimate triumphs and struggles you bring into my day.
    What a blessing you are, obeying God’s guidance to share.


    Your devotionals, Rose, always make me admire you more and more. Thank you for sharing your life and your thoughts.
    (Texas)


    Wow. This is one of the best devotionals for encouragement. Your honesty and faith journey touched me. Thank you for all you did and do.
    Blessings.


    Good morning, Rose.
    You always “connect” with the devotionals you write!!
    Thank you for sharing and brightening my day.


    Dear Rose,
    Thank you for sharing your experience and encouraging us to get into God’s word, We are so blessed to have the benefit of God’s mercy and grace.


    Good morning, Rose,
    Thank you for what you did for those teenagers many years ago. I am praying for the adults they have become. Thank you for reminding me of the key of promise in the Bible.


    Amen Rose.
    Every promise in the book is mine
    Every word, every verse, every line.
    From his canticle of love divine
    Every promise in the book is mine!
    But you have to read the book to claim them.


    Hello Rose. Thank you for another moving devotional and for sharing this experience. I continue to be amazed at the life you’ve led and the critical difference you have made in peoples’ lives. You are truly an inspiration for people like me who want to do the same.
    Blessings,
    (BC)


    Thank you, Rose, for yet another inspiring devotional!
    Your experiential stories ring wonderfully true and relevant. That you are willing to share from your own life story is brave and a fine example of the trust we should have in Christian community.
    Please continue to spur us on to live more faithfully.


    Thank you for your testimony and message to claim God’s Word. I thought of how Romans 10:17 reminds us to hear the Word of God. I love the discipline of reading 5 Psalms and 1 Proverb every day. Also, I have tried to write verses every day. There is something special about writing out the Word of God.
    Thank you again for your devotional and especially your significant prayer. I’ve shared it with several today.


    Good morning, Rose,
    How courageous of you to take in these teenagers when you had enough on your hands with three young children to take care of! How many people would do that today? Your faith made this possible and workable somehow!
    Thank you for sharing as we are all flagging these days and need to remember to pray for help.


    Good Morning, Rose:
    Always enjoy your devotionals – you seem to have had an interesting life and also a tough one at times.
    My life has been so blessed compared to yours, for which I am very grateful. Do continue to inspire us.
    Blessings,
    (ON)


    Dear Rose,
    Thank you for another of your very interesting and encouraging devotionals today. My what a busy life you had back in those days caring for your own children and several other teens. The Lord’s strength and guidance was thankfully with you. Reading our Bible certainly gives us reassurance of the Lord’s love and care for us. Blessings for your great writings.


    Dear Rose,
    Thanks for your timely devotional this morning. God is so awesome. And one of his promises that I am just recalling now says, “I will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Me”.
    Please keep sending these devotionals that are such a blessing. God uses every stage of our lives for his kingdom purposes if we only listen and obey.
    God bless you and give you a wonderful day with Him.


    Dear Rose,
    Thank you for sharing your life in the days of running a hostel for teen-age runaway children in Toronto when you were mother of 3 young children and your husband was a university student. What courage. Thank you for sharing how God was with you in your doubts. Thank you for encouraging us to read scripture.
    I am reading the whole Bible again.
    The Lord is powerful and Sovereign, merciful and mighty, full of Grace.
    (B.C.)


    Dear Rose,
    Over the years, I have noticed how easily our thoughts turn to negative thinking even when we have not had difficult isolation or circumstances. Your description using “Pilgrim’s Progress” is priceless in describing it. It hits the mark.
    As you write, we need those lifelines of remembering what God has done for us in the past, prayer, and being in His Word in order to dig ourselves out of the “Doubting Castle” and building our faith once again.
    May you continue to build your faith and trust in the Lord with whatever you face each day. Thank you for sharing so we can all find “Hopeful” and “Faith” along our journey. Blessings.


    I am not at Doubt yet, more like, Lord am I missing your Direction?
    A lot going on with people and issues.
    Thanks you for this MUCH needed, probably one of God’s answers!


    Amen Rose.
    Thanks for yesterday’s devotional.
    Apart from Him we can do nothing, and we can daily connect to him, only through His word; our Bibles.
    Blessings on your work and ministry.


    Response to the hymn ‘Jesus Keep Me Near the Cross’ brought tears remembering singing this hymn as a duet with my husband during Lent and Holy Week. Thank you.

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