Job 2:6 – The Lord said to Satan, "Very well, then, he is in your hands; but you must spare his life." (NIV)
In the late afternoon of October 10, 2013, my husband Ernie went to live in heaven –- and I went to live in another country — a country called Grief. No one wants to visit this country, let alone live there. I had no idea that the move to this country would cause such an upheaval in my life, be so painful, and seem like it would never end. As a citizen of Grief, I thought that I would be able to move back to where I'd lived before, any time I wanted. Not!
For months, I had these thoughts: "What makes you think that you're strong enough to live on your own?" Or "How are you going to live now that you have no money?" Or "The phone isn't ringing — no one cares about you." Or "You have no family or money, so you're going to end up a lonely, old bag lady." Then the biggest of all: "Why don't you just go off the balcony and end it all? Then you won't be in Grief anymore or have to endure all these health problems that have happened since Ernie died." On and on it went.
We can't escape life without knowing people who live in Grief. I had, however, never heard anyone who lived in Grief share that they had suffered from the attacks of Satan. So it came as a shock one night, as I was writing the above thoughts in my journal, to become aware that this was happening to me, when God gently whispered to me the source of my agony. As soon as I realized this, I knelt in prayer to ask for God's protection, and, in His mercy, immediately these horrible thoughts stopped.
The attacks have not totally gone away but, thanks be to God, I now know to banish Satan from my mind and turn to the One Who promises never to leave us or forsake us. I am still in Grief, but in my weakness, I have learned to trust Him more. In turn, He has provided me with His peace, the peace that passes all understanding.
Perhaps God allows us to live in Grief and suffer Satan's attacks so that we will be equipped to minister to others who live there, and let them know that they can pray for God's protection.
Zechariah 3:2a – And the Lord said to Satan, "I, the Lord, reject your accusations, Satan. Yes, the Lord, who has chosen Jerusalem, rebukes you." (NLT)
Prayer: Father God, forgive us when we do not bring our problems to the foot of Your throne. Help us to remember that You are the merciful Comforter, and that You love us and care about every detail of our life. In the name of Jesus, we pray. Amen.
Listen to this devotional
Listen while you read: "Shall We Gather At The River" (Lyrics)