Romans 8:28 – And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (NIV)
Isaiah 26:3 – Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. (KJV)
During the summer, I thought I had my life all together for the fall. I was tutoring three days after school, I had a greenhouse job at which I could work whatever hours I wanted, and life seemed all set.
When I got back from holidays I found out that there was a classroom aide job at our Christian School that I could apply for and did. The greenhouse job was postponed until February, and the tutoring job wasn't going to happen! It all went from everything I wanted to nothing, except with the possibility of an aide job.
I figured that I had a good chance at this job and the teacher had specifically asked me if I would be interested. I was full of hopes and plans. As time went on, I realized that I had peace about everything that was happening. Peace is good, but I also had feelings involved that would be shattered if I didn't get the job.
Finally, I found out that a teacher had applied. My heart sank. I knew that I wouldn't be getting the job. I was heavy-hearted and shed a few tears.
My life seemed miserable, I realized that I had to stop feeling depressed like that over a job. I remember that day very clearly. I was painting the school's roof, crying, and at the same time singing "Change My Heart, O God". When I got home from school, I called a good friend and spilled out all of my problems to her. She said she would pray that I would know without a doubt what God wanted me to do.
The day before, my father, who turns 81 today and is the main caregiver for my mother, fell and ruptured his Achilles tendon. He needed surgery and he would be in a cast until December. That evening, when I wasn't even thinking about it, I suddenly knew what I was supposed to do — without a doubt! I was supposed to help my parents get through this difficult time, by going there perhaps twice a week, to do shopping, cleaning etc. I felt really good about that and realized that God really had changed my heart! If I had had an aide job I wouldn't have been able to help my parents at all. I would have felt disappointed that I couldn't help them out. What a switch! When I finally found out that I didn't get the aide job, I didn't feel let down or depressed. I felt peace, because I already knew what God wanted me to do.
I began, though, to feel discouraged about the fact that I seemed to be a perpetual volunteer. Then I read the Daily devotional the following morning, entitled Ironman Canada (1) These words were included: "Not all of us have the same function in the great race of life…. But it is a gospel principle that those who volunteer along the sidelines … are just as essential to the success of the race as the ones who actually cross the finish line."
God knew that I would be feeling discouraged that day, and, unknown to me, led my own brother to write about volunteers and the blessings that they are to others! I wonder what God has in store for me next?
God really does listen to us. He knows what's going to happen next. He is in control of every aspect of our lives. If we find ourselves having a struggle with our hearts, let us ask God to change our hearts. He changed mine; He can change all our hearts!
- Change my heart, O God, make it ever true.
Change my heart, O God, may I be like you.
You are the potter, I am the clay;
Mold me and make me, this is what I pray.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, we thank you for your faithfulness. We thank you for taking care of us. Help us to look to you for the next move, rather than becoming caught up in our own feelings. Teach us to count on You for every aspect of our lives. Be near to us when we doubt and instead fill us with your unending love and peace. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.